It is a lonely rainy day here in Leavenworth, Kansas. I would normally like such a day, as my ancestors came from Scotland and I believe the love for rain runs in my blood. However, today is such a day that melancholy strikes at my heart and a feeling of helplessness hangs over me. Why? Is it that silly chess game you're always writing about? No...this is much more serious. My feelings match the above photo. This photograph depicts a military prison, the United States Disciplinary Barracks, Fort Leavenworth, Kansas. How do you feel looking at the photo? Looks cold and lonely to me! I can imagine what it is like to be in there. Have you ever wonder what it would be like to be in such a place? For the moment let us forget that the inmates, prisoners, convicts, etc (the people) are there as a result of some savage act they may have committed. Let us just pretend that it is you. Hey Todd...I haven't committed a crime!!! That doesn't matter for the moment...just pretend. You had your day in court and you lost. At this point you probably will lose more than your liberty. Some lose everything! Their wife, children, parents, and Friends, not to mention pensions, homes, cars, bank accounts, good name, good credit, and their minds. You show up at the joint and even your dignity is lost. You are forced to wear chains like some dangerous animal and have 3 guards surrounding you, plus there are guards in the towers pointing guns at you...ready to shot if they perceive you as a treat. Once you get inside...and please remember that it is easier getting into prison than getting out...you are degraded by other inmates. You're a fish and you have no standing with anyone; thus no rights to look at, speak to, or offer anything to anybody. What's more is that you can't read a book, watch television, play a game, and sometimes even eat. You have to be accepted....or worse sold!...before any of those things can be. Nobody cares about you and your story. Yeah, but I didn't do anything! That doesn't matter. Now imagine that the people who promised to write you, your connection to the outside, don't or stop. Who do you share the horrors with? Who can you tell that you had a visit from the Welcome Wagon and they were 8 deep and wanted to get to know you better!? Yes, best give your heart to Jesus because your ass belongs to....ouch!!!! You see frequent assaults, hear rapes, get your toilet paper ripped off, and god only knows what else. The walls close out the outside and your mind just closes. Days drag on forever and years past in seconds. It is a surreal experience and it makes you an older, wiser, but weaker person. That prison has not changed you for the good of society, but rather just change you for good. It has taken your humanity. Now imagine that you were innocent the whole time. How are you supposed to feel? How do you feel just thinking about it? Well, that doesn't happen to the good people in life, Todd. How can you be so sure?
Tuesday, May 22, 2007
Think About It
It is a lonely rainy day here in Leavenworth, Kansas. I would normally like such a day, as my ancestors came from Scotland and I believe the love for rain runs in my blood. However, today is such a day that melancholy strikes at my heart and a feeling of helplessness hangs over me. Why? Is it that silly chess game you're always writing about? No...this is much more serious. My feelings match the above photo. This photograph depicts a military prison, the United States Disciplinary Barracks, Fort Leavenworth, Kansas. How do you feel looking at the photo? Looks cold and lonely to me! I can imagine what it is like to be in there. Have you ever wonder what it would be like to be in such a place? For the moment let us forget that the inmates, prisoners, convicts, etc (the people) are there as a result of some savage act they may have committed. Let us just pretend that it is you. Hey Todd...I haven't committed a crime!!! That doesn't matter for the moment...just pretend. You had your day in court and you lost. At this point you probably will lose more than your liberty. Some lose everything! Their wife, children, parents, and Friends, not to mention pensions, homes, cars, bank accounts, good name, good credit, and their minds. You show up at the joint and even your dignity is lost. You are forced to wear chains like some dangerous animal and have 3 guards surrounding you, plus there are guards in the towers pointing guns at you...ready to shot if they perceive you as a treat. Once you get inside...and please remember that it is easier getting into prison than getting out...you are degraded by other inmates. You're a fish and you have no standing with anyone; thus no rights to look at, speak to, or offer anything to anybody. What's more is that you can't read a book, watch television, play a game, and sometimes even eat. You have to be accepted....or worse sold!...before any of those things can be. Nobody cares about you and your story. Yeah, but I didn't do anything! That doesn't matter. Now imagine that the people who promised to write you, your connection to the outside, don't or stop. Who do you share the horrors with? Who can you tell that you had a visit from the Welcome Wagon and they were 8 deep and wanted to get to know you better!? Yes, best give your heart to Jesus because your ass belongs to....ouch!!!! You see frequent assaults, hear rapes, get your toilet paper ripped off, and god only knows what else. The walls close out the outside and your mind just closes. Days drag on forever and years past in seconds. It is a surreal experience and it makes you an older, wiser, but weaker person. That prison has not changed you for the good of society, but rather just change you for good. It has taken your humanity. Now imagine that you were innocent the whole time. How are you supposed to feel? How do you feel just thinking about it? Well, that doesn't happen to the good people in life, Todd. How can you be so sure?
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